Love, Uncategorized

Why is the feeling not mutual?

Why do we like the person who doesn’t like us back?

This is for those who admires a person secretly.  This is for you.  This is for us.

Oh, how you love those little sparkles you see in his eyes.  Or you wonder why her smiles are so beautiful.  He shines whenever you see him.  Her hair beautifully moves with her.  You always see amazing things for the person you like.  It doesn’t matter if they have a bad personality or what.  It just makes him or her a human being because you know that every person has flaws.

Most of us fall for the person who is close to us.  So when we realize that we like them (not as a friend, of course), we tend to keep it as a secret.  If we can just say, “I like you so please like me back,” maybe all of us are already dating the person we like.  But the thing is they are close to us, which means that we cannot fall for them.  We don’t want them to feel awkward towards us or turn their backs on us.  Here comes our what ifs.  “What if he doesn’t like me back?” or “What if he does?” but “What if he or she doesn’t want to be friends with me anymore?”  Those were the things that we usually ask ourselves.  We consider the point of view of the other.  This is because there are things that we may sacrifice.  It’s like boating under a typhoon weather.  It’s risky.  It’s either you die or you die.  There’s a chance that you might survive, but that’s 20% chance.  So, uh, you die.  In this case, we’ll just choose to keep it to ourselves.  That is why the person we like doesn’t like us back.

But what if you already told the person you like that you like them?

First, if the response is in your favor, then good.  Be happy.  And they lived happily ever after…

But second, if the response is the other way around, accept it.  You cannot force the person you like to like you the way you like them.  Start convincing yourself that maybe it’s not meant to be.  Unless you came expecting the response will be positive.  You might be taking the wrong track.

Most of the time, when the response doesn’t resulted the way we wanted, we always say that it’s their fault.  It’s their fault for letting us fall for them.  But most of the time, we are getting the wrong signals.  Well, here’s the question.  Have you ever consider that maybe he just wanted to be a good friend?  Or have it ever crossed your mind that maybe she is just sweet because that is what she is?

Even the smallest things they did for us, our hearts will just be stunned.  Why?  We are meant to like them.  Have you ever been in a situation where there’s a person that is really good to us and likes us but we don’t like them as much as they like us?  But what can we do?  We might like them as a friend or as a person, but same as theirs?  Not.  It doesn’t make sense, right?  Love doesn’t make sense.  We just felt it, we don’t know why, we don’t know when.  You just felt it and you cannot help it.  The more you decided to stop your feelings for him or for her, the more your feelings gets deeper.  We must feed our souls with love at least once, right?  Even if it’s a one-sided love.

Love doesn’t always comes in our favor.  We have set some standards, but none of it came with one person.  We will just be surprised to like the person we least expected.

Do not expect that person to like you the way you like them.  Do not hate them.  Just continue liking that person.  Keep yourself inspired.  If it’s hurting you, focus on yourself.  You will still be loved.

Life, Uncategorized

To The Girl Who Always Had Disappointments

Maybe you are doubting yourself from all you cannot do.

Or maybe you are doubting Him.

You are trying your best to look at the positive side yet your disappointments are pulling you.

You have a strong persona but it came with a weak heart.

It maybe hard for you to absorb all the pain, from yours to other people’s pain, that doesn’t have an explanation.

Something is making you crumble and you don’t know why.

So, this pain cannot disappear because you don’t know where it came from.

But you know something is pulling you to the pit, thinking you are fighting alone.

 

But I can tell you, you have a weak heart wrapped in a glass.

Yes, it can be broken easily, but something is protecting it.

You have to consider that someone wants to protect it.

Someone wants to protect you.

Acknowledge Him.

 

Maybe you are envious of those who had thirty percent bad days in their entire life while you are having that thirty percent every single day.

Either other people might be gifted with all kinds of patience or they are willing to drop the rocks.

Oh, yes, you have considered dropping all the negative energies and I know how hard it is for you.

Thinking you might be magnetized by these kinds of energy and couldn’t get away with it.

Or how funny it is realizing that your life always ended up with disappointments.

And I know you are blaming yourself because of what you are feeling or for the things that are happening to your life.

 

Give yourself at least ten percent of space.

Leave it blank for a while.

It will help you.

Gather positive energies as much as you can.

Fill that ten percent blank space with a thought, “You came this far.  You are much stronger than you think you are.  Hang in there a little longer.  You will fell in love with your life and this world again.  Trust yourself.”

Love, Uncategorized

A Fleeting Moment

You came for a season; it was so quick. I remember talking to you with no adjustments, no filters, no judgments, no reasons. I love how you can handle me when no one else will. You are my favorite. You are magic. You are gorgeous. You are all. We ended up feeling the same way. This is the first time I felt this way—carefree but sure. I don’t remember looking sad nor poker faced with you. You. Are. Amazing. How?

But, somehow, I felt you’re holding back. Are you scared? Are you pressured? Ah, I know you are. I felt it. But I hope I can hear your answer. This is the first time, at any other day, at four in the morning, that I’m writing something like this—not the fictional that I’m used to. I have many things I wanted to say. Should I?

I can’t tell what I’m feeling right now. I think I’m sad and surprised. Not being able to talk to you made me sad and furious at the same time. So, what is the use of the add if I don’t see him chat? We had plans. Haven’t heard of you for a while. Can you tell me why? Although I knew, I wanted to hear from you. Can I?

I wanted to go back to the day we first talked. I was hurt. But I will accept this feeling so I won’t have regrets. You know, if you became happy, you will be hurt. Because of you, I realized that I was hurting in general—from all the past “muntik nang maging kami,” you are no exception. What is so wrong with me? Of course, I tried my best to prevent myself from falling in love again. I don’t want to be hurt again. But, it’s you. You don’t realize that your magnet is so strong. I was always scared to fall in love when I was younger. But, it’s you. If you like the person, you will give it a try even if you’re still scared. Because why not? I wish I was that bold before. But nah. I think I was just waiting for someone like you. You left an unbelievable mark, so I can remember you painfully. Why?

I realized that heartaches are situational—that all are possible. I know that I will be looking for you in somebody else. I know. I know. Although I had so many questions in mind, of what could be, and I want all of these to be answered by you, I wish you genuine happiness. Because you made me happy, you deserve to be.

Friends, Life, Love, Personality, Uncategorized

Drowning

I forgot how to be sad.  I have to be happy with what I had.  For me, I have to take away everything that makes me sad in order to become happy.  I was too focused on becoming happy that I hadn’t realized that there are other people who are becoming sad.  The things you thought were okay makes others miserable.

And then I realized, becoming happy doesn’t end with you.  It needs to be extended to people you care and love.  If you are happy, they should also be happy.

Sometimes, you fail as a person.  Most of the time, you are just too consistent, it becomes your personality.  It doesn’t matter if you are the first one to reach out, because constant communication is the most important.

It’s okay to be sad.  That’s how you’ll appreciate the things that can make you happy.  Try to open up yourself sometimes.  I, too, had been there before.  It was exhausting.  You don’t know what else to think that your mind just came blank.

Fight for it.  Let the people who care for you know your pain so they can understand what you are going through.

To the person who are reading this, sorry if you have to feel this kind of pain.  I know you are strong.  Don’t let yourself drown.  Swim.  We’ll be waiting for you at the end of the ocean.

Friends, Life, Personality, Uncategorized

Sugar in a Tea Cup

A lot of people might be wondering how one can definitely be happy with their environment, when happiness is one of the hardest things a person can obtain.  Well, actually, happiness is naturally within ourselves.  How can we let this happiness out and spread it to our whole being?

Imagine an empty cup.  Bring some tea leaves and put it inside the cup.  Pour hot water in the cup with tea leaves.  Observe as the color of the water changes.  Add sugar as you desire and enjoy your cup of tea.  This cup of tea is just like us.  Through time, as we try to add up things to our life, it compromises the flavor, it affects our happiness.  Our personality changes because of the things that happens around us.

I have observed the same things every time my environment changes.  Commitment with friends, work, and/or family is important for you to stay.  But how can we be happy being committed?  That’s why I used the cup of tea as an example.  Empty cups are much better to fill.  It is much easier and less bothersome if your emotions start with nothing.  Nothing to expect.  Nothing to commit before you knew everyone.  Nothing to compare.  The lesser you commit, the greater they’ll commit to you.  You will slowly feel that you are becoming genuinely happy.  As you find your happiness, happiness also finds you.

Do not lift your expectations too much.  Because the higher your expectations will be, the higher chance you’ll be disappointed.  Happiness is within ourselves.  Happiness is by choice.  No matter how bitter our life is, we cannot disregard those people and things that had been giving us happiness.  As what Marcus Aurelius said, “Look inwards, for you have a lasting fountain of happiness at home that will always bubble up if you will but dig for it.”

Wishing every one with endless happiness!

Love, Uncategorized

That Pedestrian Lane

I was walking faster than usual with a heart pounding in that pedestrian lane.

I noticed that my feeling’s becoming heavy as I cross the road.

My feet are slowly walking on the pavement.

 

And then I saw you.

 

Your eyes met mine.

I can’t explain what your eyes wanted to tell me.

But I’m sure of one thing; you wanted to smile at me but you can’t.

As I am trying to figure out everything,

 

…I saw her.

 

She was smiling at you.

And when I looked at you, you were also smiling at her,

the same way you smile at me before.

 

As we walk on our ways,

I’m trying to hold myself from turning my head on you.

 

I am now standing from the side you were earlier.

 

I realized,

 

…we were never been on the same road before.

 

And that ended our story.

Life, Uncategorized

Chances are…

Does it matter how many times you took chances in life?  With every chances that comes to our lives, do we need to take it all?

My first published book was entitled “Chances”.  It’s not second chances, third chances, or whatever chances we can have.  Some would ask me, why only “Chances”?  The hero and heroine were given not just a second chance in love but many (kinds of) chances.  And also, chances are not limited to love but in life also.  Actually, it doesn’t matter how many chances we will take or grab because in every aspect of our lives, we only want one thing—to make our lives better.  When it happens, we become happy.  We may decline some of the chances that comes to our lives but we cannot take lightness of the chances we took.  It doesn’t mean that those chances will always result to something positive but on how it can change our lives.

According to Og Mandino, “Whenever you make a mistake or get knocked down by life, don’t look back at it too long.  Mistakes are life’s way of teaching you.  Your capacity for occasional blunders is inseparable from your capacity to reach your goals.  No one wins them all, and your failures, when they happen, are just part of your growth.  Shake off your blunders.  How will you know your limits without an occasional failure?  Never quit.  Your turn will come.”  We have to take into consideration that goals are one of the reasons why we take chances.  Think of how dull our lives will be if we don’t set goals.  We don’t have something to think of doing when we get up in the morning or for the whole day, or for the rest of our lives.  As what Albert Einstein said, “If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”

Don’t count the chances you took in your life but how it helped you to make your life better.  Set goals.  Do something that will fulfill you.  So you will grow and be happy without forcing yourself.

Life, Uncategorized

To A Boat-iful Life

Life is like the ocean—vast and with waves as obstacles.  The boat is our world which holds us.  And people as they are.
Your travel in the ocean never remains the same.  There are waves moving sideward and then forward.  There are also bigger waves which makes our heart race.  The boat is doing so well by holding its people.  But when the ocean gets calm, will it also calms us?  Or does it mean that there will be bigger waves coming?  When the calm ocean means the water is shallow, does it mean that it cannot teach you anything?

Waves are not the only problem when traveling in the vast ocean.  Sometimes it is those people in the same boat as you are.  It’s either they will hand you a life vest or throw you in the ocean for them to survive when the waves get hard.  The travel became heavy and chaotic.  The ocean felt it.  And if the boat cannot handle its people anymore, it’ll bring them down.

We have to live peacefully.  Do not despise others.  We have different principles in life and we have to accept that.  Make sure that when you are trying to survive in this life, no one’s going to be thrown in the deep ocean to struggle.  You know that the boat might sink.  Learn how to swim.  Help the weak.  Don’t throw others for you to live.

Try to fight with dignity.  Fight with your struggles, but do not fight with people who might also be struggling as much as you are.  If the boat is sinking, group yourselves into those who became stronger.

Love, Uncategorized

The Concept of Love

Everybody asks me why I became a writer when I don’t have a boyfriend—rather I don’t even have an experience being in a relationship.  I always smile instead of answering.

(Stop asking me this nonsense, people, for Pete’s sake.)

I like the concept of love—how two people come together and stay together.  I love reading romance novels, watching movies, and T.V. series.  I like how writing can change other people’s lives, perspective, and how it helped them.  Writers are also human, too.  They must’ve experienced it themselves or realized it.  Experience it or not is not really important.  Understanding a person is not that hard.  When you wanted to know about the person, you just have to look and listen before opening your mouth.  Love is not something you get to feel out of experience.  It is implanted in you and will always stay with you.

Stop seeing other people like they don’t deserve your love or they might not be enough for you because there’s a possibility that you are also one of them, one way or another.  Do not find fault and perfection at the same time.  Just live simple.

That’s why I’m not taking writing as a joke.  You can destroy a person as much as you can help them.

I believe that there’s always a reason behind every person’s decision about love.  That love defies all odds, whether with the same person or not.

I understand a person who decided to put up a wall when it comes to love.  They’ve always been hurt and exhausted facing it.  But I hope one day they realize that it is great to love when you have it.  When in a relationship, quit thinking that you are a burden to each other and then learning one day that you’re on the same page.  It might hurt you deeper.

Be happy, trust each other, respect each other, and grow together.  Not every person can experience what you have.

Love, Uncategorized

Tuldok

Nakaupo ako sa cafeteria ng kumpanya namin.  Doon ako pumweso sa pinakagitnang upuan.

May limang libong populasyon ang kumpanya namin.  Ang mga empleyado ay nagpadaan-daan lang sa aking harapan at likuran na para bang hindi ako nag-e-exist sa mundo.

Ang bawat tao ay katumbas ng isang tuldok.  Naitago ko ang aking mga kamay sa ilalim ng lamesa, sa ibabaw ng aking mga binti.

Napatingin ako sa pintuan ng cafeteria.  Bumukas iyon at pumasok ka.

Napatitig ako’t napangiti sa ‘yo.  Sa dinami-rami ng populasyon sa mundo, paano kita nakita?  Sa dinami-rami ng tuldok samundo, paano ka naiba?

Sinundan kita ng tingin habang naglalakad ka sa loob ng cafeteria.  Palipat-lipat ang iyong tingin sa paligid.  Patuloy ka lang sa paglalakad hanggang sa mapadpad ang iyong tingin sa aking direksyon.

Ang dalawang tuldok ay nagdugtong.  Sumilay ang ngiti sa iyong mga labi.  Ang doon nagtagpo ang ating mga bituin.